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In a slump
By adrastos
10/9/2009 2:06:07 PM
I thought I'd jump on here and see if I could use this resource to help me. I need to do something different. I feel like I have tried and tried and tried to stop looking at pornography, but inevitably I fall back into it.

I've had this problem for about 18 years now. Like others I've had periods where I've been able to abstain long enough to get priesthood advancements, go on a mission (although I started having problems again when I was in the mission field), temple marriage, etc. I keep going back to the filth. I have been meeting with my Bishop, attending AR meetings, but I still seem to struggle. Its like apathy kicks in and all my preparation to keep myself from falling to temptation is for not. During those moments I seem to not care, but right afterward caring, realization, guilt, it all comes back to me. Its a vicious downward spiraling cycle that needs to be broken.

Unfortunately, I don't have any clean time to share, I'm trying to get myself on my feet. It feels like I can prepare for hours building up my spirituality but give in to temptation on whim. I feel like a weakling, reality has set in that I cannot do this without help.

This is my first time sharing on here, even though I've shared in AR meetings countless times. But any help/advice for getting started when you are in a slump would be appreciated.

Comments:

Identify Triggers    
"I didn't realize until recently that I have triggers that weaken me to give into the temptation. I llike you am repeat addict. I was addicted to porn in my teenage years. Back then porn became an escape for me from my less desirable life. Now porn is an escape when I am bored, frustrated, or tired. Which happens more at work than at home. Anyways, I feel me identifying boredum, frustration, and being tired as triggers has been a huge step for me. Now I try to fill my life with more appropriate escapes. Like when I am bored I get up from my computer and walk the halls talking with staff. When I am frustrated with a project I set it down and work on something else. When I am tired I take a nap. Which my wife does like either but I know she would whether have me do that than the other. I hope this comment helps."
posted at 16:17:01 on October 9, 2009 by MDud 80
it's more than an addiction    
"I've been using Candeo.com along with the Church program to help better understand "why" i keep going back - I highly reccomend you check it out"
posted at 21:51:11 on October 9, 2009 by Anonymous


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"Don’t live your life in despair, feeling sorry for yourself because of the mistakes you have made. Let the sunshine in by doing the right things—now. It may be difficult to begin, but pick up the scriptures and immerse yourself in them. Look for favorite passages. Lean on the Master’s teachings, on His servants’ testimonies. Refresh your parched soul with the word of God. The scriptures will give you comfort and the strength to overcome. "

— Richard G. Scott

General Conference May 1990