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So Much Has Changed Around Here
By hope4change
2/9/2009 9:49:03 PM
There seems to be quite a few new members around here since I was around last. It also seems however that a few haven't been around. Where'd everybody go? I hope all is well for all of you. Unfortunately, things haven't seemed to have gotten much better for me. It feels like I'm wedged into cold tar and just not getting anywhere. Also though, I haven't been putting much effort into my recovery either. I've just been on a spree of dirtiness. It sickens me to think of the things I've done.

I just hope that one day it'll all be gone. That I can move past the log in the road and just know that hapiness is instore for me. I want to get married, and have a wonderful family one day. I doubt I'd even attempt it if I weren't free from the bonds of my sins and of my past.

To those of you that are new here, I wish the best to all of you and your righteous endevours.

-Hope4Change

Comments:

We're still here    
"I think we're all still here, just quiet right now. I have noticed the change too and am glad there are more people finding and using this site. I guess I don't have anything helpful to say most of the time. My struggles as a wife of an addict lately have been intense and I don't want to discourage anyone with my negative thoughts. I'm still trying to come to grips with all of what he has done. He has been extremely selfish in his actions to me throughout our marriage. I never knew about all of his sex partners before we were married and not about the addiction to maturbation and porn either. What keeps me going is realizing that my husband didn't ask for this to be in his life either. He was sexually abused as a very young boy (6 or 7 when it started). He had adult experiences with sex as a young child whose mind was still developing. Yes, he had choices about what to do with his addiction and he chose poorly (that's part of my struggle) but I have a great deal of compassion for him as well.

On the bright side, my husband has been sober for 6 months now! I am very happy about that. He somehow has been able to completely turn his back to the filth that has been a part of his life for 30+ years. He is a different person than he was 6 months ago. He treats me completely different. I'm not sure what he is doing that is any different than anyone else here--reading scriptures everyday, praying with real intent, praying with me morning and night, daliy family prayers, holding a calling, attending ARP meetings weekly. I know his desire is stronger than it ever has been. He went through a year long repentance process before his mission and stayed fairly clean until we got married. I think he was a "dry drunk" for those 4 years. This time though, he's been excommunicated and just about lost his marriage and family. My husband let the addiction escalate into adultery. Maybe loaing his membership in the church and almost losing me has helped him.

God bless everyone who comes to this site for support. I commend you for your efforts. I so wish that my husband had tried to get help before he escalated into adultery. This is a tough battle we are fighting--let's not give up!!!"
posted at 10:14:51 on February 12, 2009 by bikermom


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"Are you battling a demon of addiction—tobacco or drugs, or the pernicious contemporary plague of ography? Whatever other steps you may need to take to resolve these concerns, come first to the gospel of Jesus Christ. Trust in heaven’s promises. In that regard Alma's testimony is my testimony: "I do know," he says, "that whosoever shall put their trust in God shall be supported in their trials, and their troubles, and their afflictions."

— Jeffrey R. Holland

General Conference, April 2006