My Struggle...
1/23/2009 6:27:47 PM
Well my story is kinda a long one. Just before I start keep this in the back of your mind. Im priest age now and this started a while ago. Like deacon age. Okay. So around the time I received the aaronic priesthood I was struggling with an addiction to pornography and that led to an addiction with breaking the law of chastity. Eventually my parents caught me with the pornography and so I saw the bishop for that and overcame it. I havent been really addicted since but I have glimpsed a few times since. However, I was too ashamed to tell my parents about my problem with breaking the law of chastity so I just kept doing it and didnt tell anyone. While I was a teacher I started going to EFY which is one of the most amazing things in the world! They should have something like it for people who are addicted to things like this. It was also around the time that Hezbollah and Israel were shooting rockets at one another. This made me fear that the Second Coming was much closer than I thought so I went to my bishop and confessed about my addiction. For a while I didnt tell my parents but after 7 months of being unworthy they finally cornered me about it and asked, well more like pried it out of me. But within a month of them knowing I quit. I went for about 10 months, went to EFY again and had one of the most spiritual experiences of my life. Then I was seriously tempted and caved in. For a little over a year now I have been a slave to this addiction again. I started seeing my bishop about 7 months ago and have been trying to overcome this. I saw the "A Brand New Year" that the church put on and thought it was the most amazing thing I had ever seen in my life. It was such a spiritual boost that was desperately needed. My dad has known about it since a little before I started seeing my bishop again. My mom pried it from me the other night. I really didnt want her to know what was going on. The worst thing my parents can do to me is tell me that theyre dissappointed in me. That really gets me down and feel really low. But now I'm trying the gauntlet again. Im gonna keep trying to quit. So far this year I'm at a 18-5 record. My bishop said I should wait 4-6 weeks before I can start passing and blessing the sacrament. I decided to go 6 weeks to truly prove that I can do this. I want so bad to be clean again. I want to serve a mission. I want my life to be the best it can be and thats why I'm going to give this up. But I know I cant do this alone. Thank you guys for your blogging. It truly helps me! God bless!


"T-Rev, thank you so much for sharing. I know it's tough to do sometimes, so I appreciate the time you've spent telling us about your desire to do what's right. That motivates me, too! So, thanks!

What a great example you are, as well. I waited and waited for years and years to admit that I was powerless to overcome my addiction on my own, so I'm proud of you for addressing this obstacle early and for including your bishop and your parents in your recovery efforts.

I can tell from your writing that you are a sincere young man who has a strong desire to do what's right. Hold on to that desire. Never get discouraged even if you slip up occasionally. Your Heavenly Father loves you no matter what, and He will always extend the hand of mercy and grace to you when you show a willing heart, and that's exactly what you're doing. I testify to you that this addiction is beatable, but only through the full and proper application of the Atonement of Jesus Christ. He is the way, the truth, and the life. He is the only one capable of saving us.

I hope you'll continue writing and be sure to tell us about your experiences serving in the Priesthood and passing the sacrament. What a great service you'll be performing for your brothers and sisters!"
posted at 02:36:32 on January 24, 2009 by dude
"Hey good to see you posting - you are not alone T-Rev and together we can all be stronger. I've heard about you from a mutual friend of ours and I just want to say how great it is to see you posting and see your desire to get totally free. I know how strong you are spiritually and I know this is a battle that as long as you put the Savior as your Captain - you will win!

One of my favorite quotes is in Step 6 of the LDS Recovery and it is from President Ezra Taft Benson: "May we be convinced that Jesus is the Christ, choose to follow Him, be changed for Him, captained by Him, consumed in Him, and born again."

You can and will do it T-Rev and we are all with you little brother!

Power in Purity!"
posted at 07:22:13 on January 24, 2009 by whitewolf

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"Nothing is beyond [Christ’s] redeeming reach or His encircling empathy. Therefore, we should not complain about our own life’s not being a rose garden when we remember who wore the crown of thorns! Having bled at every pore, how red His raiment must have been in Gethsemane, how crimson that cloak! No wonder, when Christ comes in power and glory, that He will come in reminding red attire, signifying not only the winepress of wrath, but also to bring to our remembrance how He suffered for each of us in Gethsemane and on Calvary!"

— Neal A. Maxwell

General Conference May 1987