By anon16
9/15/2012 9:24:29 PM
I'm on day 123. And I am still not worthy. I'm still struggling. I'm a college student now and out of the month I've been here, I've taken the sacrament 2 times, one of which unworthily. I've seen my bishop every week. Media, of course but I've almost slipped a few times.

I'm really struggling with not slipping but I don't want to slip. Yet I do. I'm not on here a lot any more, not even sure why I am tonight. I'm slipping, I know I am. Not much I can do. I feel so hopeless and alone sometimes here and I'm not sure why.
I want to be worthy but it keeps snowballing out of control. I keep messing up with media and I really hate it. I get closer every day to 0.

Why should I continue to try? I always fail. 123 days is nothing if I'm not worthy. It's nor really that long anyway if my almost slips count.


Don't give up    
"I am day 61 of not having masturbated, but I have not viewed picture pornography in many years. My problem was with reading material that had sexual information in it and then getting aroused by it.

I had gone 6 years without masturbating and then I messed up on July 15th 2012.

I think Satan is trying to just encourage you to just quit. The reason I masturbated 61 days ago was Satan convinced me that my thoughts were so sexual that I might as well just do it. Do give up. Just keep trying and pray that the LORD will help you in your repentance."
posted at 00:57:36 on September 16, 2012 by Anonymous
"Oops, I did a mistype in the above comment. I wrote "Do give up." I meant to type: "Do not give up.""
posted at 00:59:17 on September 16, 2012 by Anonymous
"I have trouble with the same sorts of things. Have you attended SA meetings? These meetings have been very helpful for me. Plus, I have a wonderful sponsor. If you haven't tried.SA yet, maybe you should. The program works ehen we work the program."
posted at 02:26:36 on September 16, 2012 by Anonymous
it's only natural    
"Anon, If you just moved away from home for the first tim, there are so many problems and so many temptations associated with that experience, that it's only natural that you would find yourself tempted by the same things that have always tempted you. Considering your past, of course you would have these thoughts and temptations.

So, Please don't be so hard on yourself or get so down on yourself if you are so tempted. Its normal. It's natural. And you do have the strength to overcome. With Christ, with your Bishop, with your support group, and with your faith, you will win this battle! I personally do not believe that 1 bad day of temptation and sin negates more than 100 days of sobriety.

You have done awesome! You should be feeling great! Satan does not want you to feel great. He wants you to feel depressed. He wants you to think that you can't win. That's a lie! You are doing awesome! I'm so proud of you.

Keep being honest with us, with yourself, and with your Bishop. Keep doing your dailies. Pray to your Father in heaven as if you mean it, as if you truly do need him every hour. He knows the bad things you have done, and he knows what you're thinking, but he still loves you! He want you to succeed, and he will help you.

Please stop worrying about the temptations that come to you so often every day. You can't stop those from coming right now and it's not your fault that they come. They will eventually stop coming as you fill your mind with goodness and with the Lord. But you should not feel bad when temptations com right now. Even Jesus was tempted as you are being tempted. Being tempted does not make you bad."
posted at 11:18:58 on September 16, 2012 by beclean
"123 days is nothing if I'm not worthy." That's a lie    
"My Bishop and my previous 2 therapists have made sure I realize how important each day is, regardless of my worthiness. Even my previous YW president did before I graduated. Make the covenant each day to stay sober that day. A screw up here and there does not mean you are back to square one. Although you are still struggling daily with media, you are doing great staying sober in another area of your life. Slip ups only take us back a few steps, not all the way down to the bottom of the mountain. Each day is progress, even if you may not be worthy that day. Another day sober is another day sober.123 days IS 123 days. Don't overlook that importance."
posted at 15:58:32 on September 16, 2012 by SmileInTears
Relax in a hug from your Father above    
"Start by rereading BeClean and SmileInTears. I would like to repeat everything they already said. You are a Daughter of God. Your Heavenly Father and Mother are pulling for you along with your Savior and the Holy Ghost. As you said about a year ago discouragement is from Satan:

Don’t let him get you down. You have come a long way over the last year and even a complete relapse wouldn’t negate that. Progress is progress! I know what you are feeling because I have felt it too at times, but we have to ignore Satan’s lies and accept the reality of our Heavenly Father’s undying love.

Heavenly Father’s Favorite (We all are)"
posted at 16:40:16 on September 17, 2012 by justjohn
Don't look sideways, look up!    
"Not one of us is worthy. We all fall short of the glory of God. Be still and know that he is. The guilt that you place on yourself if from the devil.

Pray to fill your purpose. You are only a traveler passing trough this life with only a short time, and any effort no matter how small is honored by your Father in Heaven.

You will only begin to see Christ when you understand that you will never be able to make yourself worthy. Surrender is all you have to give. The act of sin is in all of us. Focus on the Saviors loving gaze and the grace he gives all of us.

The only way we do not have his grace is when we refuse to accept it, as it is right there and there is nothing we will ever do to earn it. You are His and you are loved. Let GO, and know that he is God. Let Him show you who you are. "
posted at 22:08:47 on September 20, 2012 by Anonymous

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"I will speak briefly of the principle of repentance. How grateful I am for the understanding we have of this great principle. It is not a harsh principle, as I thought when I was a boy. It is kind and merciful. The Hebrew root of the word means, simply, "to turn," or to return, to God. Jehovah pled with the children of Israel: "Return . . . and I will not cause mine anger to fall upon you: for I am merciful . . . and I will not keep anger for ever. Only acknowledge thine iniquity, that thou hast transgressed against the Lord thy God." When we acknowledge our sins, confess them and forsake them, and turn to God, He will forgive us."

— Richard G. Hinckley

General Conference April 2006