Is there such a thing for men (or women) as ...
By confidence
8/7/2011 1:06:24 AM in a deeply spiritual, non-body oriented way? What I mean to say is, have you ever had sex with your spouse in a way where you were so emotionally enmeshed that it was just sweet and so close?

Or, is there always an element of "my body wants" in the act?



"For most of my marriage it was the "his body wants it" and I had to come along for the ride ;)

I know that there is such a thing as intimacy like that. I always thought I just had high expectations or that it was just for those couples that are the "match made it heaven"

Still a struggle though for me to say thats what I have."
posted at 01:18:43 on August 7, 2011 by faith21
"but i think for most guys it might take a little work to get the emotional sex. alot of guys can be selfish lovers + its just about getting off sometimes, but i imagine for some there are some that have the connection. those are the guys that probably talk of it like 'scared' or 'sacrament' not one of those....i dont assiciate sex with sacrament of a marriage"
posted at 16:12:06 on August 7, 2011 by skyteamst90
"When sex started becoming the outcome of emotional intimacy, it finally became sweet. To do this, i had to give up everything associated with my addiction. When my brain was finally able to make my spouse the sole object of my sexual release it was wonderful, beautiful, as God intended. Unfortunately it took me 25 years to discover. For 25 years it was all about me. I don't want to ever go back."
posted at 21:43:31 on August 7, 2011 by chefdalet
I think there is....    
"I know I have definitely felt the difference between sex to satisfy my addiction, and sex because I love the person I'm with. I can tell when I'm having addict sex (married or single). I suspect though that it is easier for women than for men.
posted at 22:08:46 on August 7, 2011 by dstanley
"For a SA, how long did it take to start making headway in that direction?
*Is it easier to "practice" by having sex, or is it more difficult?
*It's so difficult being on the non-addict end as I really want that sometimes if I'm having an emotional day and perhaps have a spiritual moment with my husband. But, then I have to fight against all those things in my mind, body and heart that says, "Are you crazy? This guy is not psychologically/emotionally safe, and definitely not safe to be so intimate with - and especially in that way.""
posted at 00:57:30 on August 8, 2011 by confidence

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